My American Idol

I am in love. Period. Yup, that's the doll. Katharine Mcphee, the runners-up in American Idol Season 5. Absolutely captivating is she. America may have voted for Taylor Hicks, but not me. She definitely gets my vote any day of the week.

Initially, I had not been following this season's American Idol but when I heard "Someone to watch over me", I knew what I had been missing. I love this old standard and when Katharine performed this song........ Wow! Absolutely captivating. Even Simon saw it fit to say "you make the others look like very good amateurs." I am in complete agreement with him.

I guess her classic defining moment of greatness must surely be "Somewhere over the rainbow". It's magic. Pure magic. She sounds as though she has been doing this all her life.

Can hardly wait for her debut album!

Destined for solitude

A friend of mine described me as a male Sumiko Tan, at least in relation to my blogs: rather interesting, occasionally funny and very bitchy. He proceeded to remind me that Sumiko Tan is now very single and bitching about relationships. Hence, the title of this post. To digress, I accused him of being yahya papaya considering the recent breakthroughs in his life, that shut him up but not the resonance of his words.

Anyway, not that I am awfully bothered or anything, my MSN personal message still defiantly proclaims that "Solitude is better than compromise". Yet, even as I constantly remind many of my friends, everyone's biological clocks ticks away slowly but surely.

I think I may have lost interest in girls after all. Well not really, just that I have not mustered sufficient interest in any thus far to garner any action. Or have I been so accustomed to inactivity that it is now my activity of choice. Or has there just been a general lack of motivation on my part. Historically (okay, I should balk at using this word since someone described me as a historian based on my penchant to bring up someone whom he believes is a relic from the past). Ok, commercial break aside, historically, I have been more prone to action when my friends are. Not that I lack independence totally or what, just sometimes when my buddies are all tied down with their activities, my boliao-ness generally spurs me into action.

Now, I just can't seem to be genuinely interested in any particular girl. Moderate interest, yes. Marginally interest, frequent. Unqualified interest, I have to take you on a stroll down memory lane.

How about xxx? My friend would ask. Well, she is blah blah blah but...........
How about yyy? She is blah blah but........
You think you very handsome ah? hiam here hiam there?

Very common conversation I had lately. Let me state for the record that I am not being picky, just perhaps I have yet to meet someone who is the "complete package" to spur me into action. Or perhaps I have embraced single-hood as a way of life........... destined for solitude......

The middle road less travelled

I am convinced that extremism is better than moderation. Yup, you read that right, extremism is better than moderation. While this does sound contrary to conventional wisdom, allow me to elaborate further. Before that, let me add a disclaimer that I am neither right wing nor left wing and I have no political affliations whatsover.

Moving right along, let me give an example, its better to be extremely ugly than moderately pretty. Case in point Ruhua. Very few would dispute her ugliness, yet this very trait is her claim to fame. Last I checked, she is more famous than Rainie Yeung, a sweet young thing. Innocent, pretty but not quite in the mould of say Alyssa Chia. Ruhua on the other hand, have very few equals in terms of hideousness.









How about fat? If you are absurdly fat, you can be a sumo wrestler and earn big bucks. In Japan, sumo wrestlers are highly revered and get to marry pretty actresses. On top of that, an apprentice sumo wrestler will wipe the arse of the most established one because apparently they are too fat to do it themselves. Strange but true. If you are moderately fit however, you are just one of those who regularly frequent planet fitness and incur speculation if you are spending the 'pink dollar'.




Talent? Extremely talent-less is also a claim to fame. Just look at William Hung, no doubt his five minutes of fame is over but he milked it for all its worth. Cut albums, acted in movies and even a drama serial with Nancy Sit. Not bad for someone who was described by Randy as 'horrific". Moderately talented folks? I would like to name them but no one comes to mind, just some blurry images on American Idol floating in my mind. Silence speaketh volumes, no?















So at the heart of it all, is it better to be extremely evil or moderately good. Lately I had the opportunity to effect vengeance on a certain vicious individual who like a shark, goes crazy at the taste of blood. Well, I didn't. I just told her about her mistake and asked her to remedy it. She proceeded to feign ignorance and eliminate all evidences of her guilt (we have an old shredder in the office that is extremely loud). This morning, she was all over another colleague for a supposed mistake and attempted to discredit me. To cut a long story short, she failed. Sometimes I wish I can be more evil or more 'good' if you like, to the extent that I can just swallow this with nary a complain or once in for all plot her downfall to eradicate all further threat from this quarter. That way, I would be much happier, no?

Looking and not seeing

She hates me, she positively HATES me with a passion and she nurtures that passion dutifully. Just now as I was walking towards the restrooms, my paths crossed with a certain individual and even though the corridor is not wide enough for a sumo wrestler to pass through comfortably, she waltzed on by as though she knew me not. In hokkien we call this syndrome "kwa um pat" or literally "see don't know". To top it off, she gave a very dirty look to the ceiling as if the fault lies with it.

Admitedly, I am not exactly crazy about her. Okay, that's putting it mildly, I think Bush and Osama has a cordial relationship compared with ours. Although I try to move on and at least display some semblance of civility in our relationship, I think the feeling is most definitely not mutual. Not that I am really bothered to do anything beyond that other than blog about it during times when I have absolutely no inspiration whatsover. Whatever. Surely there are more important things worthy of my time, like for example watching my nails grow, counting the number of times my colleague whines about her depression and reading about Chee Soon Juan's latest rant. Yup, there are better things to do.

Anyway, moving right along, I believe my 'boliao-ness' has reached new found heights or depths if you like. I was checking my emails last night and bitching with Ms Kiew on MSN when I decided to comment on and reply a rather how should I put it, comment worthy email. So I did and I concluded I am too boliao. Well it's hard to really explain the situation without giving more details that may risk offending the protaganist in the unfortunate event that she finds my blog. Then again, stranger things have happened (right? Mr Woo. For example Ms P stumbling on your frenster profile) on the world wide web. So anyway, parties who are privy to my evil thoughts probably would agree with my conclusion. After all, I did forward my reply to some people, thereby even further lowering their already poor opinion of yours truly.

I think I am too free. Not really free as in nothing to do, but more of restlessness. After all, it has been a while since any noteworthy events have occured in my life. The only deviant from my routine is my big move, sucks, I know. Even as my friends around me pepper me with interesting developments in my life, I don't think I can regal them with anything other than the latest happenings in my industry or my insightful analysis (read: nonsensical rants) on GE2006.

If you have known me long enough, such prolonged periods of tranquil inactivity is fertile ground for my wicked devious schemes. The last time I was in this state of mind, I set out to investigate whether there is truth in suspicions of homosexuality in an old acquaintance. Findings? It's not absolute but the based on the observations of 3 out of 4 reasonable man, little doubt remains. It's a pity Captain is not in town, else he would be a very good ally in hatching evil, evil birthed in boliao-ness.

Stay tuned.......

It's complicated

What's that? Every time I see someone's friendster profile and they describe their present availability as "it's complicated" the bitch in me starts to wonder. What's so complicated. The woman he is about to marry is actually his long lost sister? She used to be a he but now decides 'she' likes woman after all? He is thinking of how to dump his girlfriend of seven years for a rich heiress whom he is going to dump once he gets her money to return to his present gf? He is actually a secret CIA agent and he doesn't want to endanger his partner by revealing his maritial status? To quote a certain politician, "please lah!"

What's so complicated? Methinks sometimes people just have too much pride. Being of marriageable age and still single is nothing to be ashamed of. Of course, on top of that, the IC (it's complicated) people don't want to burn any bridges by stating they are "in a relationship". There you have it, it's complicated- I am attached unless you are single and attractive in which case I am available. That's where the complication is.

Sometimes when you are shopping, especially for high value products you play a similar game don't you. When you are looking at cars or hi-fis for example, you wanna find out more about the product don't you. If you exhibit complete disinterest, odds are, so will the salesperson, unless they are really hungry for a sale and you are the only one to have appeared in the past three days. On the other hand, being a salesperson myself, if I have no intention of buying any time in the near future, I would not want to take up to much of the salesperson's time, lead him/her on and distract him/her from real prospects. So I guess for me I am not buying but I am not a mere browser either, it's complicated.

Or at job interviews, on one hand you must appear valued at your current workplace since no one likes a whining loser and yet you must not seem entrenched where you are now. So how is your present situation? It's complicated.

So why am I writing all these gibberish? It's complicated........

Election

Or more accurately Election 2. Nope, not the General Elections that everyone has been talking about but the Louis Koo/Simon Yam movie. One word, sucks. It really does. After the prequel was such a well directed effort by Johnny To, I had high expectations for it.
Needless to say I am totally disappointed in Election 2. Its such a slipshod effort with lacklustre performances from Simon Yam, Cheung Kar Fai and Cheng Hao Nam. Note that I didn't mention Louis Koo. Note that he put in a sterling performance, but I long ceased to have any expectation of his acting. He is one dimensional and his expressions are from the Keanu Reeves school of acting.
The most interesting thing about the show was the crowd. As expected from an 'ah beng' movie, the crowd (with the notable exception of yours truly) were predominantly ah bengs and ah lians. As expected, mobile phones ringing and loud talking were the order of the day. This group of ah bengs behind me kept making fun of the Richard Gere visa advertisement as one guy kept mocking the little girl in an Indian accent. It's kind of funny the first time, but not when he repeated "but there is only enough for one bird" like five times in less minutes than that.
As the movie ended, the same ah bengs started to say "CB la, waste my money. Stupid show....." not that I disagree with the content but still....... As we were walking out, an ah lian stepped on some split stuff that looked like vanila ice-cream to me and started swearing. She didn't look a day over sixteen to me and yet the movie was rated M-18.
Some of my friends think I am an ah beng too but doing a candid self-assessment, I am not qualified to be an ah beng as I lack the following qualities:
1) An immaculate command of Hokkien
2) Golden hair
3) Tattoos
4) The latest Nokia mobile phone models (beng lians exclusively use Nokia as Sony Ericsson is too complicated for them to handle, :p)
5) A loud high pitched voice
and most importantly
6) The ability to squat for hours

Thank God my ear holes have sealed up already else that would testify of my ah beng-ness.......

The simple pleasures of life

Just now as I was walking on the streets, I realise that I have not been reading for a long time. I don't mean reading for knowledge, or information or out of necessity, but then simple unadulterated joy of reading for pleasure on itself. I think I read a reasonable of books, but I realise that since I started working, I read primarily for knowledge. Especially since I embarked on my career change to doing sales, a lot of my books are from Joe Girard, Zig Ziglar, Brian Tracy and the like. The other half of them are related to my faith. The rest of my reading materials are periodicals, so I can keep updated with recent developments. I have scarcely read for pleasure since graduation.
The only exception to that are Mario Puzo books. I am embarassed to say that I have read the 'Godfather' more comprehensively than the Bible. Somehow, I never tire of reading about the exploits of the Corleone family and the various spin-offs. You can just read maybe one sentence from the book and I can complete the entire scene for you. My copy of the Godfather is more well-worn and read that my Master Tax Guide ever ways, or my auditing textbook.
A couple of years back when I first watched The Fellowship of the Ring, I went out to buy the book and started reading it. Then I complained to my cousin that while it is compelling it is not exactly easy-reading who then laughed at me "This is what happens when you fill your mind with Tom Clancy and Ken Follett for the past few years." And indeed he was right. My linguistic competence has been stagnant for quite some time.
Maybe it's time to start reading for the sole purpose of enjoyment once again. Not only for knowledge, not only for self-enrichment but for pleasure as well. Then maybe I will start writing better, :)